Are Singaporean Women Too Materialistic in Relationships?
A Growing Frustration Among Some Men
A recent post on r/SingaporeRaw sparked a heated discussion about dating dynamics in Singapore, with u/Ehehehe090 questioning whether women in Singapore choose partners primarily based on financial stability rather than love.
"It's like they choose their spouse/bf based on materialism, what we can give them in terms of income, security, car, house, etc?" – u/Ehehehe090
He also suggested that while women today enjoy equal rights in education and career opportunities, they still expect men to take on traditional financial responsibilities, such as paying for meals, covering bills, and supporting the household.
"They have equal rights now but don’t want the equal responsibilities because it does not benefit them." – u/Ehehehe090
Different Perspectives: Are Relationships Always Transactional?
While some agreed with the OP’s sentiment, many others pushed back, arguing that relationships have always been transactional to some degree, and both genders have their own preferences when choosing partners.
"Every relationship is transactional in some sense." – u/Academic-Bat1963
"Women look for security and provision from men since the beginning of mankind. It is in-built in their DNA to do so." – u/2late2realise
At the same time, some users pointed out that men also have expectations when choosing partners, particularly when it comes to physical appearance.
"There’s nothing wrong with considering the lifestyle a man can provide. I’m pretty sure you prefer a more physically attractive girl over an elephant." – u/mcpaikia
Others suggested that social media and modern dating culture have amplified these transactional tendencies, making it seem like women are only in relationships for financial gain, when in reality, many women are financially independent and do not rely on men.
"Most local women are independent. Try dating women abroad who have an entitled belief that men should be the sole provider. At least in SG, women from young are trained to be equal and independent." – u/theprobeast
Materialism vs. Security: Where’s the Line?
Some users argued that there is a difference between being materialistic and seeking security.
"Younger girls will go for looks, but after a certain age or after bad experiences, they prioritize stability more." – u/Maleficent_Today_934
A few also pointed out that while men may feel pressured to provide financially, women also face societal expectations, such as managing the household, raising children, and balancing careers.
Meanwhile, some users dismissed OP’s complaints as an excuse for his own dating struggles.
*"If ALL the girls you go after don’t want you, there are only two reasons:
- You’re looking at the wrong girls.
- You’re just not good enough for your own taste."* – u/mcpaikia
"Maybe you just like materialistic girls." – u/troublesome58
Final Thought: Are Modern Relationships Fair?
Ultimately, expectations in relationships have evolved, and both men and women have their own sets of standards when choosing partners. While financial stability is a factor, it isn’t necessarily the only one—compatibility, personality, and emotional connection still play key roles.
Is it fair to call modern relationships too transactional, or is it just a reflection of human nature? Perhaps the key isn’t to blame an entire gender but to find someone whose values align with your own.
